this drink, this poison,
my escape from this reality
my entrance to the world i want to see
for that brief second, pretend it is his love
he holds me, but it's not him
this kiss, it's not his
staring at the wall, feeling nothing at all
don't even look him in the eye
the minutes fade into a haze
before he leaves, he tries to make contact
i'm not here
this didn't happen
this is all a mess
it's all a mess
i lied to myself again
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