My Friday feels like a Saturday, but less fun.
I woke up at 8:30am, got ready for class, and just when I was about to walk to school, I suddenly changed my mind. I feel horrible about myself, and I completely lost the motivation to attend my music theory class.
Last night was probably the worst night of my life. No, I lie. It probably could have been a LOT worse. I realized that I am completely doomed to failure no matter how confident I become. I don't know if that is my fault, or because others ignore to see what I am really worth.
People are fake. Relationships are fake. Even love is fake. What IS real are judgments, lies, and egocentric, idolized beings. People love to mimic those that "have" everything, even if it means lying to themselves.
I just don't get it. I'm SICK and TIRED of meeting people who can't be themselves.
I've made some new goals for myself due to the consequences of the choices I had made last night. I'm not going to pursue anything I'm not sure about. It's just like being led in the dark. I'm going to hang out with my girlfriends more than my guy friends. I'm just not going to pursue any males for a long, long time. Not until they learn to grow up, which could take years.
I'm going back to watch nip/tuck.
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