bit by bit.

how can one person make another feel so small and unworthy.

it is so difficult for me to even be myself. i am myself though, all the time. fact is, i'm too nice and caring, and it's these traits that make me get walked on, all the time.

when i do get my head on right, and i defend myself, people then suddenly don't want to be near me. they view me as a threat. i guess nowadays sticking up for yourself is the "no-no" in such a selfish society.

we've forgotten how to bond with one another. we're all individualistic. we all worry about ourselves. when we fall down, we go to someone to help us back up. and then when the pain passes, that person that helped you is forgotten, until you need it again.

it's all about self-gratification. we party to hide our real selves, we drink to forget our problems, we stick with fake friends because we think we can't get any better, we have one night stands because real love has been forgotten. we pass our problems on to other people instead of fixing what's there.

people think i'm crazy. that i should go to a councellor. i'm not though. i'm a big enough woman to try and DEAL with my problems. i've made my mistakes though. i've tried getting help from others to help me. people don't want to hear the brutal reality of someone's life. we always want to pretend it's not there. maybe this is why our society has so many issues, and why the media is there to console us. fuck.

i'm not crazy. and i'm not stupid. i speak the facts. people hate it.
if you can't deal with me, then don't talk to me. but in the end, if you have a problem, i'll help you with it. because i don't want to fall prey to the curtain. and if you can get back up and do the same for someone else, then we can finally offer hope for the well-being of society.